求一个英语笑话. 在线等.. ! 急!一个简短且简单的英语笑话,50词左右,尽量用初一以下的词汇 . (最好有翻译的.

求一个英语笑话. 在线等.. ! 急!一个简短且简单的英语笑话,50词左右,尽量用初一以下的词汇 . (最好有翻译的.
求一个英语笑话. 在线等.. ! 急!
一个简短且简单的英语笑话,50词左右,尽量用初一以下的词汇 .
(最好有翻译的.

求一个英语笑话. 在线等.. ! 急!一个简短且简单的英语笑话,50词左右,尽量用初一以下的词汇 . (最好有翻译的.
1)TOM'S EXCUSE
Teacher:Tom,why are you late for school every day?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go
Slow".
汤姆的借口
老师：汤姆,您为什么每天上学迟到?
汤姆：我每次路过拐角,一个路标上面写着："学校----慢行."
DID YOUR DAD...
2)Tom call Jim's name:"I can't bear such a foolish!"
and Jim say:"You mother could (bear)!"
汤姆对着吉姆骂道:"我受不了你这个苯蛋了!"
吉姆说:"你妈妈能!"
附:bear 有两重意思:"生"和"忍受"这个笑话正是根据这点.
3)Tom call Jim's name:"I can't bear such a foolish!"
and Jim say:"You mother could (bear)!"
汤姆对着吉姆骂道:"我受不了你这个苯蛋了!"
吉姆说:"你妈妈能!"
附:bear 有两重意思:"生"和"忍受"这个笑话正是根据这点.
4)A man goes to church and starts talking to God.He says:"God,what is a million dollars to you?" and God says:"A penny",then the man says:"God,what is a million years to you?" and God says:"a second",then the man says:"God,can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second"
一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊,一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."
5)Mother sent Tommy to the store across the street to buy a good box of matches.When Tommy came back,mother asked him,”Did you buy a good box of matches?”
“Yes,Mum.”Tommy replied,”I have tried them all.”
一盒小火柴
妈妈让汤米去马路对面的商店里买一盒好用的火柴.汤米回来后,妈妈问他,“你买的是好用的火柴吗?”
“是的,妈妈.”汤米回答,“我把它们都试过了.”
6)Father:Uh,oh,I think I just made an illegal right-hand turn.
Susie:That is okay ,dad,the policeman behind you just did the same thing!
开车
父亲：哎呀,我刚才违规右转弯了.
苏西：没事,爸,跟在你后面的警察也这么转了.
7)Little Robert asked his mother for tow cents.”What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?”
“I gave it to a poor old woman,”he answered.
“You’er a good boy,”said the mother proudly.”Here are tow cents more.But why are you so interested in the old woman?”
“She is the one who sells the candy.”
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱.
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆.”他回答说.“你真是一个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说.“再给你两分钱.可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的.”
8)Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked,”What happened?”
“A kid bit me,”replied Ivan.
“Would you recognize him if you sew him again?”asked his mother.
“I’d know him any where,”said Ivan.”I have his ear in my pocket.”
他的耳朵在我的衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里.他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口.”伊凡说.
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问.
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说,“他的耳朵还在我的衣兜里.”
9)Teacher:Here are two birds,one is a swallow,the other is sparrow.Now who can tell us which is which?
Student:I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher:Please tell us.
Student:The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
两只鸟
老师：这儿有两只鸟,一只是麻雀.谁能指出哪只是燕子,哪只是麻雀吗?
学生：我指不出,但我知道答案.
老师：请说说看.
学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀,麻雀旁边的就是燕子.

A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.
一天，教授正在给学生们监考。他发下试卷，然后回到讲台前等待。
Once the test was over the students...

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A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.
一天，教授正在给学生们监考。他发下试卷，然后回到讲台前等待。
Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying "A dollar per point."
考试结束了，学生们纷纷交回试卷。教授发现一张试卷上别着一张百元钞票，还有一张纸条写着：“一分一块钱。”
The next class the professor handed the tests back out. This student got back his test and $64 change.
第二堂课，教授把试卷都发回学生们手中。其中一个学生不但得到了试卷还得到64块钱的找零。

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What's the difference between a monkey and a flea?
A: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can't have monkeys.
猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢？你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢，那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤，而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。这个答案很有意思吧？
Q...

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What's the difference between a monkey and a flea?
A: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can't have monkeys.
猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢？你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢，那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤，而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。这个答案很有意思吧？
Q: How can you most irritate a farmer?
A: By treading on his corn?
如果你踩了农夫的玉米或是谷物，他肯定会生气的；而如果你踩了农夫脚底的鸡眼，他会更生气。Corn既可以表示“玉米/谷物”，也有“鸡眼”的意思。
Q: Which is the strongest creature in the world?
A: The snail. It carries its house on its back.
因为snail（蜗牛）的后背上总是背着一所房子，所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的生物是不足为奇的。你说呢？

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Once upon a time,there were three man:Alex,Frank and John.They were on a train to Shanghai.Than Frank asked John:"what is the most wonderful thing in the world?"John said:"oh,I think,pymarid is the mo...

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Once upon a time,there were three man:Alex,Frank and John.They were on a train to Shanghai.Than Frank asked John:"what is the most wonderful thing in the world?"John said:"oh,I think,pymarid is the most wonderful thing in this world!"And than, Frank asked Alex:"What is the most wonderful thing in the world?"Alex answered:"emem..I think the Summer Palace is the most wonderful thing in this world!""what do you think ?"Alex and John ased together.Frank said:"oh ,I think the most wonderful thing in this world is thermo!"

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